Ostomy covers are just one in a long series of supplies necessary in the care of colostomy and ileostomy patients. The words ileostomy and colostomy refer to the procedure ending up with a bag coming out of the abdomen that fills with stool. They are usually placed in folks who have lost the distal portion of their colon (colostomy) or when the entire colon has been removed or when the small bowel must be diverted (ileostomy). They can sometimes be reversed (called a take down) when the underlying reasons for placing them are fixed (such as massive decubiti ulcers).
All ostomy sites, whether they are ileostomy or colostomy sites, must be protected to ensure their survival. Ostomies require care to prevent ulcers at the exit site. They can get ischemic and and swollen and obstructed. Sometimes they need to be surgically revised. They need to be kept clean at the surface to prevent infections. They should be kept dry while in the shower or bath.
And that stuff costs money. You can find ostomy covers and ostomy bags in all assorted sizes and colors at online stores or at your local medical supply company. In fact you can even find designer ostomy covers and bags. Maybe this represents a growth opportunity for the higher end designer bag makers Coach, Kate Spade and Loui Vitton.
Designer ostomy covers and bags could take future growth projections for these higher end bag makers to a whole new level. The growth opportunities are enormous for an aging and wealthy population who cares less about the bag on their shoulder and more about the bag on their belly.
But don't forget about the little ones out there. Perhaps even Disney could market Minnie ostomy covers and bags for the little kids out there stricken with illness. You could have the best first grade show and tell ever with your Goofy ostomy cover. Most kids bring a trinket . Your kid shows his Goofy ostomy cover.
Think of the other possibilities. Hospitals could throw designer ostomy cover and bag parties as a new way to fund their daily operations as the Medicare National Bank goes belly up. Or perhaps, in addition to pet therapy dogs, an ala carte menu of optional services for patients could include offering them special ostomy covers for their ostomy bags.
Look at the spirit of cooperation between hospitals and hospitalists and you can understand the power of market economics in medicine. Many doctors are troubled by today's EMRs. They don't know it yet, but someday EMRs will be their saving grace. And it has nothing to do with making medical care better or more efficient. In fact, as insurance cheapens the value of medical education, EMRs will become nothing more than a tool for direct marketing.
Medical doctors could go the way of chiropractic marketing and show up at trade shows and State Fairs peddling a whole array of ostomy covers and ostomy bags to a public willing to spend their money on everything but actual health care. Or better yet primary care doctors, internists and gastroenterologists could give the knock off jewelery and purse parties a run for their money. These doctors have a focused clientele right at their finger tips. If they have a patient panel and an EMR, they have a whole new and exciting business opportunity just waiting for them.
They just have to run an EMR comparison for those patients with an ostomy and send them an invitation to their private party selling designer or knockoff designer ostomy covers and bags. You think Pampered Chef parties are out of control. Wait until you have a million doctors inviting you to their ostomy cover parties. Just you wait. It's going to happen.
I don't think anyone in Washington thought of the unintended consequences of a declining Medicare payment model coupled with the explosion of EMR technology. Doctors are business owners with an entrepreneurial spirit. They will always search for alternative sources of income as insurance decimates their bottom line. Third party insurance companies just don't want to pay for health care anymore. I witnessed that first hand with my physician review experience. And selling ostomy covers is just one way for doctors to survive. But it won't stop with colostomy covers and ileostomy bags.
Someday you'll have pulmonologists using their EMR for direct marketing of their designer tracheostomy parties. You'll have vascular surgeons using their EMR for direct marketing of their designer stump parties. You'll have opthalmologists taking up designer eyeball tattoos with the help of their EMR. And you'll have primary care doctors doing botox. Oh wait, they are already doing that.
That's the future of the EMR. It has nothing to do with medical care. In fact, the future driving revenue for doctors won't be medical care at all. Insurance killed that idea. It will be medical supplies. Instead of using the EMR to streamline health care, doctors will use it to data mine their patients for the direct to consumer advertising and marketing of goods and services. You heard it here first. You thought the drug companies were bad. Just wait until doctors figure out the power of the EMR.
The whole idea of doctors using their office and patient panel as a direct marketing force de jour lies on the premise that patients are more willing to pay for things than for service. And that's true for most of them. You see them pulling up in their full sized SUVs with the shiny 26 inch rims, their smart phones, their $200 jeans and their cigarettes sticking out of their designer purse. You know they're willing to pay for image. But they won't pay a $10 copay to evaluate their diabetes, heart failure, COPD, atrial fibrillation, high cholesterol, leg pains, dizziness, shakes, dry skin, diarrhea, gas, rash and sore throat all in one visit. You want to survive the future of health care? I suggest you get yourself an EMR and start selling something tangible.
And for the patients who don't want anything to do with designer ostomy covers? What do we do about them? How do we make money on them in the future? We don't. But we take great pleasure in discovering the lengths people go to save a buck. And we enjoy the creative nature of the human mind. Like this awesome guy who made his own designer ostomy cover (actually for a urostomy) by cutting out the back side of a bottle of liquid laundry detergent. I suppose you could say his ostomy will never get dirty. Perhaps this guy should start his own business selling ostomy covers to poor people, so he can then buy one from you at your exclusive invitation only ostomy covers party.
Now there's a thought...
Nice article on ostomy bag covers
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